Many of us deal with our sufferings, pain and/ or problems in different ways. If you were raised around males, you will see that they have a different way of dealing and coping with difficult life situations. Or could be, it dependence on how they were told to express themselves as they were growing up.
Have you heard the expression “los hombres no lloran” or “big boys don’t cry”, “You have to take it like a man!” I used to hear my father say that to my brothers repeatedly. They were just children at that time!
Today, I always think, “What did this guy go thru to be such an asshole?”
Human suffering is everywhere in the world around us. We all have experienced untold, hidden trauma like sudden deaths, abuse, bullying, and violence. Men do not talk about the trauma they suffer Why?
It is experienced that men usually don’t burden others with their problems. They dealt with all their issues on their own. In our society, if a man suffered in silence from trauma, he is awarded the badge of honor. Boys usually learn from their fathers.
Fathers tell their sons that crying is for babies and girls only. Although in our society, males are told that they need to be tough, “Quote” “if you don’t stop crying, I will give you something to cry about!” and powerful enough to survive in a man’s world. T
This is one of the many reasons why males suffer In silence.
We usually hear and see bad male behavior like violence, addiction, shootings, aggression, and criminal behavior and make assumptions that it’s a part of nature of a man,
This unspoken pain and suffering from childhood trauma and men is not always talked about. That leads to projecting trauma onto others. If not onto others, hurting themselves by allowing the infections of inner wounds to spread viciously inside and start self-medicating, by turning to alcohol and drugs.
Until we are ready to talk about male trauma, we will continue to set up the next generation of males to fail in their emotional life. Males are struggling day and night with so much failure at a much higher rate than females.
Unfortunately, today, we have many walking wounded men suffering from depression, anxiety, addictions, or other disorders. For most men talking about their pain and trauma is seen as a weakness.
It is a time to end the trauma suffering by raising our boys to connect with their hearts, give them confidence and permission to share their pain and feelings with their loved ones, or someone they trust., allowing themselves to talk openly about male trauma and seek help from available supports groups, talk therapy as well as other mental health professionals..
We all need someone who can understand our pain, it’s OK to cry and to share our feelings. As Human beings, we all should take a step to reduce the stigma for males to talk, cry, and heal themselves for the sake of our future male children.