Does that mean that the trauma will never stop? No, that just means that you have not stopped the cycle in your life. Have you changed your life circumstances? Have you physically stopped the violence in your personal life? How about your friends? Or is it your immediate family? Your kids, How about your parents
- Get help for yourself?
- Is there someone you trust that can help you? Family or friends?
- Have you gone to a Support Group? As always, I highly recommend a support group. Not only will you find good friends there, but all the help and resources you may need.
If you’re a female, there is help if you use the resources given to you in these past articles. Remember, you are not alone. Seek help. Ask and you shall receive. (A very popular phase).
I believe, it depends on how bad you desire to get out of your situation. Yes, it hard. You have a choice. Especially if you have children. They believe in you to keep them safe. After all, you are their protector. They will love you, no matter what, but we will pay for it after they become adults themselves.
If you yourself do not feel safe, how do you expect your little ones to feel, they can read you like a book. If they see or feel how you are feeling, you are not fooling them. I thought I was when I was trying to protect my children from the trauma of seeing their mother been abused.
My middle child remembers me laughing when my flesh was been ripped off me by my now ex- husbands’ teeth. She remembers me laughing trying not to have my children be traumatized by seeing their mother all bloody. I did not realize; she saw more than I thought. They can not always be fooled. My daughter is now in her thirties, and she remembered that.
According to the CDC, 44% percent of lesbian, 61% of bisexual women, and 35% of heterosexual women have experienced rape or physical violence from a partner. 26% percent of gay men, 37% of bisexual men, and 29% of heterosexual men have experienced the same. These are alarmingly high rates of victimization that have a particularly negative effect, especially on women and children.
Some men have the same particular abuse from women. I have a brother who came home from work that evening and everything from his house was taken. At first, he thought they had been robbed. But there was a note from his girlfriend that she had left him and not to come looking for her. She stated that her son had just been released from prison and she wanted to live with her son. She claimed he needed her more than my brother needed her.
It took my brother a long time to get over the whole situation. My brothers too suffered an abusive childhood as well. It surprises me, that, they are not alcoholics like their father. Involved in drugs or women beaters. Of course, my mother had a lot to with that.
My mom made my brothers promise her not to beat women, because, she said: “you hit a woman, you will be hitting me.” They may shake the shit out of one, but they will not hit one.” I know they would want to, but as far as I know, they haven’t. I am sure I would of find out. I used to have 6 brothers now I have 5 left.
Now when you feel stronger, and your vision becomes clearer, remember the law of attraction. Your power, as a person with a focus, you will feel more empowered and at this point, you will less likely to accept bad behaviors from others as well as yourself.
Remember, you have that power, to maintain control over your life and your journeys and adventures. Practice good safety measures for yourself, as well as you would your children.
You can manage to stay focused on positive thoughts. Turn this into a habit, and try, if not try again and again as long as it takes. Try to focus on the positives of each day.
Many blessings to you.