It hurts to see a child mourn over the loss of a pet. I am so proud of the way some parents deal with their children when one of the pets who has been with them most of their lives departs. It’s okay, to be honest with your children about the death of their pets.
It’s okay to shelter them from the ugliness and hurt and pain of a loss of a pet. It’s up to the parent/parents if you want to shield the children or expose them to the reality and process of life. It is up to you, the parent.
Exposing Children to the Reality of Life
Exposing them could prepare them for future losses. If exposed, it makes life easier to understand the process of life. It is up to you, as a parent, how you handle the positive or negative effects on your child’s personal development.
My grandchildren have had many animals, cats, dogs, and even have had a little cousin die of cancer in their lives. My daughter, allowed them to feel the loss because it is the cycle of life. It is never an easy thing to go through.
My grandchildren were allowed to see their pets and say “goodbye”. It was a school day and mom let them stay home and even called their teachers, to let her know that they would be going through some “mourning” for the loss of their dear pet.
How wise is that? As we go on with life, we will experience many deaths, other than our pets, but starting with our pet’s departure, is a good way to explain the process of life.
It’s okay to let out your feelings.
It is important to allow feelings of sadness, shock, or feeling lonely because it is a “normal” reaction to the loss of a pet. Sometimes children try to ignore those feelings because it hurts too much.
It is better to face the grieving and express it. My grandchildren, all of a sudden out of nowhere, would start crying. Saying “they are missing their pet.” It is okay, to feel like you feel. it is okay to cry, or not to cry. It is okay to feel angry, let go when you’re ready to just pour out your feelings. We explained it was okay to feel those feelings.
They lost their little cousin to cancer, and the grieving was not any easier, but understandable. That was hard on all of us. My grandchildren expressed the pain was the same as losing their pet. We were so glad, that they understood the process. It is a part of life.
Consider the following:
- Let your child see you express your own grief for your pet.
- Allow the children to express their own sense of loss for their pet.
- Please do not make them feel guilty or ashamed. “you did not want to take it outside, remember that!”
- Allow your child the opportunity to create a memorial, a memento, or a shrine, with the pets’ pictures and play toys.
- Do not rush to the pet store and get a new pet, allow your children to grieve for their last pet.
- It would be wise for both children and parents to volunteer to work in a veterinarian’s facility or a shelter home for animals, it will brighten your spirits, especially your child’s.
Remember, if you are having trouble doing your daily routines, for example, staying in bed, crying, not eating, and not showering, please get help. Call your local Mental Health facility, and ask for advice or help.
Many blessings and positive loving and encouraging energy to all of us.