Tag: childhood trauma

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More Homeless Children This Winter

 

I still have not heard what congress is doing about the no-eviction order. I am very worried about what is going to happen to the children. We know that homeless teens are suffering, resentful of adults, and authorize personnel who actually want to help them and get them off the streets.

Those teens are distrustful. They are children who are suffering and in pain, because of some trauma they are going through or have gone through. There are many resources they can utilize and shelters they can assist with other programs to get help, even if the home is not an option.

 

Can you imagine what a female teenager is going through right now? It’s cold outside, shelters are packed with other homeless. They don’t want to go home to an angry parent /parents, who right now have other mouths to feed.

Moms boyfriend is not a safe person to trust right now.  Sometimes the shelter homes will assist you with a program to help you get off the streets.

Now, the eviction ban program is coming to an end and many Landlords are ready to have people evicted. Because they need to make payments on their property or they too will lose their livelihood support as well.

How about our children, those young ones who don’t have any control over anything?  What a time to lose a home, it winters today, but it has been cold for a long time now, since September and it has gotten colder. Doesn’t it feel like no one cares? Like the Government who started all this “stay indoors control gatherings, wear your Masks.” What is a person to do? Do what they say.

This reminds me of the depression in 1929 and continued until 1933. Others are saying this is how things will be.  The Spanish influenzas started in 1918 and lasted until 1920.

Today, we have COVID-19, which started I believe in 2019. I believed I caught it during a time my immune system was low, as I laid in a hospital bed. After I got home from the hospital, that same day, I woke up with a really bad cold, I had a high fever, my body ached with pain, and I was having trouble breathing.

My chest hurt. I recovered within a month at home. I felt like I had shortened my life span. I was very weak afterward. Today, I feel back to my old self again. Healthy, vibrant, and energic. I am grateful to be here today.

I worry about the children and how all this will affect their little lives. Will they be traumatized? Will they be OK with all this? Children are so adaptable in many situations. It starts from a strong parent, a survivor themselves. A survivor who refuses to be a victim, but a survivor.

When I was talking to one of my children. She stated she had survived because of how strong I was during the bad times. I thanked her for that, I was feeling so guilty about the trauma I placed them through, by making bad choices.

As parents, we must forgive ourselves. I finally did as I write this book of survival. Some children will pull through. Some will have a rough start; some will make something of themselves. For their instincts, tells them to survive.

May God bless them, and continue to protect them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Unresolved Trauma is Killing You

In my coaching practice I work with women who struggle with unresolved trauma that extends back in time, sometimes trauma they endured from their earliest age. If you have traumatic memories locked away in dark recesses of your mind and hidden inside your body, this unresolved trauma is killing you.

This is an innate survival instinct. It’s as if your higher aware self realizes that if you had to deal with the pain from these adverse childhood experiences (ACE) head-on, you may not survive the process, and at the very least, it may affect the rest of your life so dramatically, your life may crumble all around you, jeopardizing your survival.

A client is attracted to or referred to my practice because they are suffering the consequences of repressing unresolved childhood trauma. While my clients may look like high-functioning adults on the surface, the unresolved traumatic wounds, which though they are hidden from the surface, continue to fester and infect the area in the mind or the body where they are hidden from conscious view.

The more the hidden wound remains ignored, the more the out-of-sight the more septic it becomes. It grows and spreads its toxic poison throughout the body, and it will surface somewhere as a symptom. When unresolved trauma expresses itself, it may show up in the form of disease symptoms.

Most medical science will dictate that if the patient comes in with the symptoms of gastrointestinal disorders, then following the prescribed treatment regimen for that disease would be the logical course of action to administer as a proper medical response.

But what if the root cause of the disease (whatever disease that may be) is this toxic ACE wound that is continuing to grow and release even more poison into the body, while the doctor treats the symptom?

The patient feels better, may even be able to clear the symptoms of the originally diagnosed disease, but the poison continues to spread, expressing itself again. This time presenting a new batch of symptoms. Maybe this time they show up as the symptoms of heart disease, some other disease, mental disorder, self or substance abuse.

The body will continue to break down and deteriorate until there is no life left in it if, and the victim will often entertain suicidal ideation if these unresolved childhood traumas are not dealt with, and they will have no idea why their life is in shambles. The symptoms can cause problems in all areas of life including friends, family, and the workplace.

If you are ignoring or pushing down your trauma from the past you are sick and tired, and your life is a mess.

The thing is, that your mind is desperately trying to protect you, and experience has convinced your subconscious mind that this (hiding the wounds) is the best course of action because it works – in the short term. You get up the next morning, your life goes on, seemingly without a hitch… while the poisonous toxins invade and spread silently in your body until they reach critical mass and reveal themselves.

In many cases, repressed trauma will stay hidden until another traumatic event, news reports, or the death of the perpetrator triggers the memory.

In my life, I have dealt with enough adult trauma to keep me focused on my own recovery. I have spent most of my adult life working with others dealing with mental health issues, many of which were the result of repressed trauma, and it wasn’t until my own childhood trauma was uncovered under hypnosis, that I realized how important this work is and how deep the rabbit hole could go.

I was nearly killed as a four-year-old victim of sexual abuse, and this led to a series of victimization which continued until my teens, which my mind protected me from, knowing that I might not have made it otherwise, so these memories were secretly stored in my body, and they did express themselves as a disease.

Into my adult years, I continued to find myself in dangerous and abusive situations, dealing with each one, until I could finally break the cycle. I then focused my efforts to help other victims do the same, freeing themselves from the cycle of abuse, healing hidden wounds of unresolved trauma, and starting a new life, free from trauma.

Some of this work is so critical and deep, that we must summon all the power of God and the universe to do this sacred work.

I am a fourth-generation Curandera Healer, who retired from my work as a Mental Health Counselor for the State of Oregon after 34 years of service. I also studied to become a Reiki Master and teacher, and am a Certified Olympian Life Coach.

It takes all the therapeutic science, training, tools, techniques, spiritual practices, and intuitive coaching methods I have been able to accumulate to find ways to help victims take their lives back from the trauma they suffered in the past, so they do not have to be victims anymore or ever again.

I have written a book entitled Trauma-ties which reveals my traumatic past and gives the reader insights into their own potential hidden and repressed trauma. I also train and certify counselors to be Trauma Advisors.

If you are suffering from repressed trauma, please feel free to reach out to me. And remember, you are not alone. With a compassionate and empathetic hand, we can get you through this.

If you are a therapist or counselor looking to expand your practice to include helping others with unresolved trauma, and you are interested in becoming a Certified Trauma Advisor (CTA), please contact me as well.

Many blessings to you and yours,

Rosa M Luna

 

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How Will COVID-19 Affect Christmas Today?

I feel like we are being imprisoned for something we did wrong. What did we do? We are wearing our masks, staying at home instead of entertaining ourselves outside our homes, like walking through the streets watching the Christmas lights at this time of year. Going to different stores, and also seeing how other people decorated their homes for Christmas.

The shopping malls are open for shoppers, but with limited entries for a certain amount of people only. We also are limited in gathering with our families. This saddens me. I love gathering with my family during these special holidays.

I am going to miss this so much. First, it is going to be my daughter’s birthday. Then it’s my birthday, our survivor’s celebration (Survival Day), then Christmas. We would have many parties during December.

In the past, it was different. What is this Christmas going to look like this December 25, 2020?

With domestic violence already on the rise due to the pandemic restrictions, the holidays are bringing far more trouble to families across America than we ever bargained for.

It’s hard for the authorities and mental health providers to keep up with this growing epidemic, and already, we know that it is the season for increased suicide and violence among all age groups.

While I am writing this article, it is not Christmas yet. In my family, we celebrate during this time, before Christmas, because during the holiday season, many years ago, I was in one of my abusive marriages, and my kids and I escaped from this abuse during this time in December

Now, we use this as an excuse to celebrate our Survival Day. We have been celebrating this day for many years now.

We, as in my three children, their spouses, and my 5 grandchildren, sometimes invite other special people into our lives, but mainly it is, just us.

I am very proud of my children; they are finally free of their childhood trauma. Sometimes we go back and remember what we escaped from. We count our blessings.

In December, my husband had come home and he must have taken drugs because he was acting worse than ever. As I mentioned before in my writings, I would place a quarter in my older daughter’s pants pocket to escape from the house and call the police.  This time, I hid all the knives from the kitchen, told them to leave and go to our neighbors’ home and call the police.

It took the police hours to find my apartment because my daughter could not remember our apt. number. Until finally, in the middle of the night, he fell asleep and as I ran out of the apartment, the police stopped me and asked me if I was the one who had called the police? I said “Yes” and started to run off, and they stopped me saying they could not go in and arrest him unless I came in with them.  I was so frightened. “He was in bed asleep I told them, no weapons, I hid all the knives”.

When they placed him in handcuffs, I took my money (which he had taken from me) from his wallet and I used that money to leave him. We left with only the clothes on our backs. He used to stalk us, even with a restraining order in hand.

Now we celebrate our survival by giving gifts to each other, dinner, and having a fun time with peace of mind, knowing we are now safe to do as we please. My daughter reminded me of our situation back in the day, and how it was through her eyes.

May God continues to bless all of us who have survived, and many blessings to all.

 

 

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Save the Children Change the World

IF you were to look at criminals in prison, you will find that most of the offenders have a history that includes being a victim of childhood abuse. In fact, 1 out of 20 children are victims of child abuse, and these innocent youths are likely to grow into adults suffering from addiction, mental health problems, and are more likely to end up swallowed up by the court system. Children are the future. Save the Children Change the World

Every state spends billions of dollars combatting the effects of childhood abuse in adults.

In my work with those with mental health issues, most of them started with trauma in childhood, mostly sexual in nature. These wounds run deep and prevent the victims from ever having a normal life without intervention.

Our crime statistics would reduce massively if we could just give our children the love and support that they need to have a healthy foundation for a better life.

ACEs are Adverse Childhood Experiences, and they are slowly killing our youth. They are 8 times more likely to commit suicide before coming to adulthood. These young brains and bodies need nurturing to release the proper hormones which are necessary for normal childhood development.

Trauma has many faces. Childhood trauma can be the result of not having enough food to eat, lack of adequate shelter, or domestic violence. The greater the exposure to ACEs, the more likely they are to become addicts, antisocial, mentally ill, or criminally minded.

Childhood trauma creates an incredible financial drain on the community as these children grow up and create problems in society as we try to address their needs. You can hardly fault them for something that happened to them as innocent children, and we are faced with the reality and cost later in life.

Children inherit their cycle of hardship from their parents, and they are likely to raise families that duplicate the generation of the problem after generation, unless we can start to do something about it at the earliest stage: These precious babies.

For communities without adequate resources, they are unlikely to affect making the situation any better because you cannot punish a broken person to wellness. There are not enough prisons in the world to deal with this issue of adults who are wounded and broken to no fault of their own.

Economically challenged neighborhoods are the worst breeding grounds for childhood victimization and abuse, which is passed on generationally.

Your Community Can Be the Difference

Life could be saved and changed. These victims could become active valuable members of our communities with the right kind of attention and programs.

Leading with compassion, some churches and community organizations have started to reach out to the victims, with supportive, non-judgmental home visits without strings attached. This has the most measurable impact on the youth being visited and supported.

These young victims need to have access to proper medical attention without having to burden that family with the expense of doing so. Churches or other non-profits can help to subsidize the medical attention needed.

“Normal” children have access to educational and social programs that may be out of reach of the economically challenged kids. A funded and empowered organization can help to bridge the gap and create opportunities for underprivileged children to participate in these programs. This helps to breed self-confidence and esteem in the young children who would otherwise fall victim to the cycle of hardship.

Seeing that our children, all of our children in our communities have adequate food, shelter and clothing is a key to the gateway of breaking the cycle.

Want to change the world?

Help a child break free from the cycle of hardship.

Many blessings to you.

 

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How to Heal from Childhood Trauma

Healing from childhood trauma is not easy. As an adult however, it is possible to heal. If you want to get over your past trauma, you first need to understand how it affects you. If you experience trauma in childhood, you will be having trouble in keeping up with the daily routines of life.

Just deciding what to wear to work is very stressful to start off the day. That’s if you can keep a job. Childhood trauma, as I have mentioned before, effects almost all aspects of our lives. This effects how you work with others. Being intimate with your significant other, friends, co-workers, and authority figures. There could be many more problems that we have not touched on yet, all depending on your experience.

There are some techniques from which you can recover from the trauma of childhood.

  • Distance yourself from toxic people:

Not that you are religious, but we do give the bible some respect. It says in     1 Corinthians chapter 15 verse 33 that “Bad associations spoil good habits”.

There is a saying in Spanish that my Mama Luna would repeat to me frequently when I was young, “Dime con quien te yuntas y te dire quien eres.” Tranlation -“Tell me who you hang around with, and I will describe what kind of person you are.”

Healing needs a peaceful and nurturing environment to grow in. If those whom you choose to associate with are using drugs, drinking, cannot hold jobs, lie, cheat, steal, and manipulate you, you are associating with toxic people who are poisonous to you and your healing process.

  • Healing, cannot take place in a toxic environment.

Things to help you heal from childhood trauma is to remove toxic encounters in life. Many things and everything that you can control or change that is toxic in your life need to be removed. “May God give you the courage to change the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference. (Sound familiar? It’s part of the Serenity Prayer). I use this prayer to help me remember that I cannot control other stupid people.

When I am not feeling safe or comfortable.  I can only control how I feel and how I want to my environment to be.

  • Learn self-regulation

Developing simple mindfulness techniques like breathing, relaxation, and meditation can help you realize you can make things better.  Meditation and yoga can calm your mind, enhance your life physically and emotionally.

  • Sometimes it is difficult to sleep. Sleeping gives the body time to heal the mind.

Avoid caffeine during the day. That includes sodas, some contain caffeine. Drink plenty of water, mix in some lemon to add flavor. Plus, drinking lemon water is good for the gut and lowers belly fat.

  • Seeking support from those you trust.

Sometimes it’s not possible to heal from childhood trauma alone. If you want to find your way back to harmony, start by seeking support from those you trust.

  • Eat!

Do you remember when you were a child, seeing someone get very grumpy when they or you were just hungry? In my personal experience, I would start getting angry or frustrated because I was hungry. But I did not realize that’s, what it was.

  • Start getting in touch with your body. Listen to it. How?

By eating healthy and at the regular times, it gives your brain the fuel needed to heal. Minimize your symptoms of anger, anxiety and depression by eating a well-balanced nutritious diet.

Sometimes your body is trying to tell you to get some rest, when your nose is getting stuffed, your throat is getting scratchy, you just might be coming down with a cold. Listen to your body symptoms, it is trying to tell you something. Are you taking your vitamins?  Our body does not always get the nutrients it needs from our food and vegetables.

  • Socialize

Trauma forces you to isolate yourself sometimes. When you are healing, try to engage with more people. Explore new things, join other support groups, you may meet others who have gone through what you are going through right now and they will understand. It can give you the good association you needed in this time to heal. You will start to feel, that you are now in safe surroundings. But please, continue pay attention to your body signals, or your gut. If it does not feel right, it may not be.

Considering the physical and mental health issues that occur alongside childhood trauma, it is very important to find an experienced medical specialist or therapist that can help you with your physical, mental, and emotional healing. It might take more than one specialist.

Some specialists or therapists can use the inner-child process to get in connection with and spending some time with your inner child and comfort him or her.  Reassure your inner child that now you are in a loving and safer place.

You can resolve the hurts of childhood that lives inside you, by having your healer use some of those methods to heal yourself.

Allow yourself to recognize all the techniques you have used to keep yourself safe. Be real with yourself while recognizing all the coping strategies that you have learned. They may not be working in your best interests.

The incidents and things that happened in our childhood shape us forever.  But remember to let go of the past, love yourself and forgive yourself unconditionally and remember that you are not alone.

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Is Trauma Hereditary?

Trauma is defined as a physical and psychological threat or assault to a child’s bodily integrity, sense of self, safety, survival, or to the physical safety of another person significant to the child. Have you ever thought that trauma is hereditary? Do we have to go through a traumatic episode also, as did our father, mother, or family? It does feel that way, when you hear the history of your family.

Early childhood trauma (i.e., those bad things that happen before the age of six) lie at the root of most depression, anxiety, and many other emotional and psychological illnesses. Could this finding be heredities?

Why do some of us in the family continue to suffer with trauma? Are we making these choices for our loved ones? Must it carry on to every generation?

Due to traumatic experiences, children are susceptible to psychological disorders and severe emotional turmoil, often needing trauma therapy assistance.

Heredity trauma is also known as intergenerational trauma.

What causes intergenerational trauma?

Intergenerational trauma can negatively impact families as a result of unresolved emotions and thoughts about just living life. Negative repeated patterns of behavior, including beliefs about parenting and passing on some of the traditional parts of life in a way that families live.

Untreated or poorly-treated substance abuse or severe mental illnesses can or may effect us all in someway or another.

Can you inherit your parent’s trauma?

Many types of research suggest that trauma may be inherited in many aspects. Studies have shown that experiencing trauma may abandon a chemical mark on a person’s genes, which is then passed down to future generations. Can you believe that? It scary to think that we cannot escape this.

Does inherited trauma exist?

Intergenerational trauma is usually seen within one of the parents or grandparents of one family who was traumatized enough, and each period of that family continues to experience trauma in some form or another. In these cases, the origin can usually be traced back to a devastating event, and the trauma is unique to that family. Its almost like a curse. If you believe in curses.

Symptoms of intergenerational trauma:

• Lack of trust of others
• Anger
• Irritability
• Nightmares
• Fearfulness
• Inability to connect to others
• Not getting treatment for the intergenerational trauma

Healing hereditary trauma includes the following therapies, which can break the cycle of trauma:

• Parent-child interaction therapy
• Family therapy
• Family system improvement therapy
• Working through a genogram
• Child parent relationship therapy

Other hereditary intergenerational traditions could include in times of war. Sometimes we follow our forefathers’ tradition of going to war. Parental disorder trauma constitutes an essential health care need of veterans, especially those who recently separated from service. By reviewing studies regarding the strength of several types of trauma found that many of the studies were invalid in composition and performance and that relatively few of these studies have been carried out in veterans’ populations, despite suggestions that civilian and veteran people respond indifferently about many kinds of treatment.

The board also notes that the data is insufficient for potency or generalization of ethnic minority treatment modalities.

Despite challenges in the consistency, quality, and depth of research, the board found the evidence adequate to conclude exposure therapies’ efficacy in treating trauma.

The committee found the evidence inadequate to determine the effectiveness of different pharmacotherapies, three other psychotherapy modalities, and psychotherapy delivered in group formats.

In other words, there was no pure evidence that trauma is or is not really hereditary. Or is it? What do you think?

 

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Children in Cages

How do you think these kids will be affected in 10 to 15 years? If you have been listening to the news, you have heard about these children being placed in a large cage with other kids, separated from their parents, and not knowing why. No explanation why. Not being able to get answers. Hearing other children crying for their parents too.

I remember, when I was 6 or 7 years old. My parents and all of us who could carry a hoe were working out in the fields, thinning beet plants. We saw immigration vans stop by. They questioned my parents and took me and my brother, forced us into the van. I remember crying. My Mom was crying which made me even more scared.

I remember getting separated from my brother after we got to this very large building. I was placed in a room with white kids in wheelchairs, some were on the floor, crawling towards me.  I cried the whole time I was there. Except when I was offered some food. I felt I was there for days, but it was just one day, which felt to me like a lifetime. I just cried for my parents and kept asking where’s my brother? No one would tell me. I saw these kids in wheelchairs and kids on the floor coming towards me. I later found out; I was placed there because I did not speak English.

I was so afraid they were going to eat me, when I saw them crawling toward me, trying to touch me. I remember in my nightmares; I was lying in a stretcher covered with a light blanket and when someone like a doctor comes in, uncovered me and starts cutting parts off me to feed others, and they kept me alive for body parts. I saw myself with one arm, one foot, and one leg, and other pieces of me missing.

Finally, one of my older sisters came after me and she took me home. This has been one of the other experiences I will never forget. Of course, it was a law that all kids should be in school at my age. We didn’t know why.

Now, here we are, all because of political reasons all these kids are in cages and separated from their families. Last I researched this, late in 2020, 3 children had died. All this happening in the United States! Our land of the free. Let’s go back to the children.

I had a client who I will call Carlos. Carlos was 6 years old. Going to school, had other friends in school whose parents had been taken by ICE (Immigration and Customs Enforcement) they take undocumented people who come to the United States.

The family wanted to make a safety plan. Wanted family to know what to do, where to go, like other families who were with them. Just in case ICE came. First of all, “DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR”! They will announce themselves and let you know who they are.

This child had been born in the United States but feared for his parents, and himself.  He was having nightmares and had not been able to sleep for several weeks now. “Am I going to be placed in a cage?”

I asked if they had taken him to the doctor? They said yes. But he did not help, just gave him something to force this child to sleep. But he would wake up crying. He got worse and so the parents stopped the medication. The doctor said, “All kids go through this and he will outgrow it.”

I investigated on what was their spiritual belief. Carolos’ parents went to church on Sundays, they were Catholic and were teaching their children as well.  While I was talking to Carlos’ parents, I gave him a little bottle of bubbles to blow bubbles. I asked him to tell me what colors he saw in the bubbles and what shape he saw the bubbles were. He responded appropriately.

I asked him to close his eyes and using his imagination to think of himself inside that bubble.

“Now, being inside the bubble, tell me what colors you see. Carlos tells me. I also asked if he had faith in God and his protection? He said “yes”. Long story short. I asked him to have God put the light of the Holy Spirit God, around the bubble with him in it for protection. You are building this bubble to place yourself and your parents in for God to protect them anywhere they may be, home, work, church.

We repeatedly practiced placing him inside the bubble within a second. He later said he could get inside the invisible bubble made by God for his protection so quickly, he felt safe. As I talked to the parents about other things, I would use the word “bubble!” to have him place himself inside it quicker, and he would close his eyes and imagine himself inside the bubble instantly, and say, “Safe!”

According to his parents, he didn’t need the medication and slept soundly after that.

I pray for these children, but I feel this is not enough, they need emotional resources and support as well. I understand there are some organizations, resources, and passionate people who are taking care of these children living in cages.

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What Are ACEs?

Finally, in 1998 someone decided to make an assessment test. This test was developed at the Center on the Developing Child at the Harvard University.  It has been implemented in many areas to use for screening on children and adults.

I learned that many therapists, phycologists, mental health counselors, life coaches, and anyone who wanted to help anyone, who had suffered a trauma in childhood and because of it, had changed their lives. These people were probably drawn to help others because they, themselves suffered the same kind of abuse or trauma.

Helping others to heal was and always will be the main reason you would want to do something about a severe problem that affected yourself or someone you love and care about.

Nadine H. Burke, a pediatrician M.D. saw evidence in her Center for Youth Wellness in San Francisco and wrote a book called “The Deep Well”. In that book she explains, the assessment test.

Depending on the score you can recognize that a child or person might have been producing unhealthy reserves of stress hormones.  Too much of this hormone in a child can do so much damage to the body. At a young age, this could trigger many illnesses and dysfunctional episodes in life. It can than result in many problems as you come to adulthood.

What are ACEs?

Adverse Childhood Experiences.

Screenings in which the California Surgeon General started implementing that many care givers, mental health providers, and those in a position to assist with helping victims of trauma, receive training guided by Dr. Burke, to use the ACE screenings and how to read them.  We are all effected by this.

The more ACEs a child experiences, the more likely he/she will suffer from things like diabetes, poor academic achievement, heart disease, some sort of substance abuse, and jail, or prison time.

Experiencing a frequent number of ACEs, things like stress from any routine task such as simple daily decision making, even as rudimentary as “What should I wear to work today?” Especially, if you work at a place where you have to be presentable, talk to people, or deal with people’s money.  Like work at a coffee kiosk, flower shop, gas station register, or other working environments where you could be triggered by anything (which most likely would not make sense to anyone else) that could throw you into severe “toxic stress”. This type of excessive activation of stress to the nervous system can lead to long lasting wear and tear on the brain and especially the body.

Today! How about the coronavirus? COVID 19 is a virus/illness that effects the lungs. It can spread from person to person and can be picked up from touching contaminating surfaces. That is why people should wash their hands as often as possible. Especially when getting home. Our children don’t always wash their hands. I have seen parents not wearing masks, taking their children to grocery stores, kids putting their fingers into their mouths, etc. How is it effecting our children?

As we talk about trauma and its effect on our children? Right now, some children do not have much to eat. Some schools are in their kitchens making breakfast, for kids to come in pick up the food and take it home to eat. Some buses are going to rural areas and delivering lunches. I know this because my daughter works for a school district and makes sure the buses are running on time.

But what happens when mom or dad can’t work due to the virus?  Because the virus spreads so quickly, children are stuck at home, they miss their friends, and they should not go outside to play.

Many places are banned at this time, like places of worship, workplaces are closed, children cannot go to school (that’s understandable, a very unsanitary environment). Some adults can’t go to work.

These changes are very stressful for the family as a whole.

I am afraid for the children. How is this new situation affecting them? Who is going to help? That’s why it is important for us to learn about trauma and what we can do about it.

Traumas are often repeated through families and when we address and treat them, we can break the inter-generational cycle. How powerful is that?

 

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What should I call it? Trauma?  PTSD? ADHD?

This subject is a hard subject for many of us who have suffered trauma as a child and as an adult as well. Do the pain and suffering ever stop? Yes, somewhat. But there are times when something or someone will trigger a flashback and if you are not used to dismissing the emotion of it. It could ruin an otherwise happy moment.

I was with a friend having a fun time, but the way he took off his belt from his waist, sent me back to an abusive spouse. My friend was just been playful.  I tried not to let it ruin the fun. I kept it inside and tried to dismiss it and reminded myself inside me, that “I am in a safe place and I am no longer in danger.…”

While the mind tries to forget, the survival part of the brain continues to send signals to the body that it is under a threat. When survivors blow up at a boyfriend or freeze in fear when someone disagrees with them, they rarely realize that these “irrational” reactions are triggered by imprints of a horrifying event from the past.

It’s virtually impossible to revisit those experiences without also reliving the terror and helplessness that accompanied them. Like with the smell of a certain cigarette. I can tell if it is a Camel cigarette brand or not, but most of the time it is a Camel brand. Other cigarette brands don’t get my attention. A little child crying by himself or herself in a corner triggers me. I want to run to them and save them from the monster who is hurting them. What can I do?

Most of us require assistance to feel safe enough to explore those events without also reliving the terror or horror, to truly put our experience in perspective and that ordeal belongs to the past.

If you can safely revisit them you can recognize that we were too small, scared, or powerless to protect ourselves.  Then you can not only heal yourself but take care of the wounded parts of yourself.  By talking to those wounded parts and explaining to them that now “you are in a safe place”. Talking to your inner child who suffered that pain, and telling your inner child she/he “is no longer in danger”.

Go to an experienced Clinical Hypnotherapist who understands what you are going through, or someone like a Shaman, Curandera/healer. They could help too.

I understand now, how trauma interferes with relationships, and friends after you have survived all this.  I would love to help others to heal as well.

Continue to understand that subconsciously and not understanding why you’ve reacted to something like you did, was because of something that happened to you that has changed you to someone you really do not recognize yourself!

Remember, “you are not alone!”

As an adult now, I have volunteered my services by working with children from 5 years old to 18 years of age. I have been volunteering for the past 15 and some years now. Showing children, both girls, and boys, “We will be OK and you are not alone.”

For more information on how you can help a child or get help. Located in Washington State. You can get on the Web and type onto {campvictoryforchildren.org) or call 360-791-7566 ask for Andera, Camp Victory Director.